The Slightly Insane Ramblings Of A Nobody

cursedpossums:

unrestrained summer fun

psych-is-the-name:

ravenkinnie:

I laughed so hard I choked on saliva

my hungry ass could never work at a cemetery😋

antifas:

cats when they finish their food so there’s no food left because they finished their food and now there’s no food (0 food bc they finished it)

weaver-z:

I think the only person I’ve met in real life with 100% career satisfaction was this gal I knew who was a presenter at a children’s science museum and delivered every line like she was running a WWE match. Every time you passed the room where she was giving a presentation, you’d hear something like “WHO’S READY FOR CEPHALOPODS?!?” and the kids would go absolutely nuts cheering.

segretecose:

if i was the dead wife in a male protagonist’s tragic backstory my dead wife hazy memory montage would be me laughing while scrolling my own tumblr blog

dankmemeuniversity:

umabloomer:

It’s a gay wedding quilt. All thrift store fabrics: cotton tea towels, table cloth, placemats, pillowcases, napkins. Old wool blanket as batting. Machine pieced and hand quilted.

sweatermuppet:

being in your 20s is not about love or education or careers. it is about constantly being exposed to mold & being greatly fatigued from it

c3rvida3:

Was in the emergency room for a total of maybe twelve hours yesterday (I’m okay) and Halloween candles weren’t part of the Bath & Body Works candle sale (I swear these are related), so in that twelve hour span, my partner took it upon themself to go into the Bath & Body Works and go, “My BOYFRIEND is in the HOSPITAL and he NEEDS a Three-Wick Candle in the scent MOONLIT GRAVEYARD or he will PASS AWAY,” and for some reason they were like, “Absolutely. We will break the sacred rules of Bath and of Body for you and your ailing man friend.”